The Effect of Technology on Relationships

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/happiness-in-world/201006/the-effect-technology-relationships

This article was published on psychologytoday.com by Dr Alex Lickerman, on the 8^th of June 2010.

Dr Lickerman outlines the aspects of internet use which have contributed to changes in our ways of dealing with relationships. An interesting metaphor is used throughout this article, the internet is likened to a drug on several occasions. Lickerman validates this by discussing internet addiction and the isolation that this can inflict. Excessive internet use can be psychologically and emotionally damaging. The basis for this seems to be when internet users favour electronic relationships above real life ones. The differences between the two are that you cannot receive the same emotional contact with someone if you cannot hear their tone of voice or read their facial expressions. While a certain amount of internet use or social networking is somewhat encouraged in this article, Lickerman highlights the importance of never replacing real relationships with electronic ones.

Other difficulties that often arise with technology are the differences in people themselves when they are communicating through a medium such as the internet or mobile phones. Lickerman discusses the use of CMC (computer mediated communication) to avoid face to face conflict. When someone feels they need to have a difficult conversation with someone it is often considered an easier option to do so through email, text or social networking sites. Perhaps this is because they will not have to witness any negative reactions or emotional responses. This principle also relates to “trolling” or “flaming”. Many people are happy to say things online they would never say aloud simply because they do not have to deal with the consequences of doing so or witness the emotional responses of others. Lickerman calls this “emotional invisibility”.

Lickerman closes the article with a list of recommended tools for use of technology, many of which do state the obvious such as “Balance time spent on the internet and time spent with friends and family”. However he does also advise the reader of the benefits of the technology, from social networking, to the efficient transfer of information and of course far quicker communication. He simply recommends caution and careful judgement as the effects can be far graver than expected. “Unfortunately, typed messages often wound even more gravely, while electronic messages of remorse paradoxically have little power to heal”.

I thoroughly enjoyed this article and sympathise with the general message expressed. I felt the article was well balanced, rather than focusing on simply the negatives, positive aspects of CMC were also included in this well thought evaluation of the effects technology is having on relationships today.